This is likely an emotionally delicate time in a new/expecting parent’s life.
Trust is undeniably one of the most important things when providing care to someone in the perinatal period (or beyond). You might be a doula walking a person through labour (one of the most important days of their life), a nurse working with mothers who have just given birth, or a therapist assisting with mental health as parents navigate identity changes, big emotions, and mood disruptions.
In any case, professionals working with new or soon-to-be parents need to understand how emotionally delicate this time can be in someone’s life. Establishing trust and putting a client/patient’s mind at ease is so important.
While you may completely understand your processes and what to expect during this time, keep in mind that for many parents, this is completely new.

They can feel overwhelmed, confused, or even out of their depth. On top of that, many new parents are struggling with issues like sleeplessness, postpartum depression, or self-criticism, all the more reason why establishing trust and creating safe, nurturing spaces are extremely important.
But how can you do that? If you’re in mental health, a medical profession, or another support role, these below tips are for you.
Explain your process and what to expect:
With new parents, don’t assume they know everything (or even some things!). New patients or clients might be coming to you with a lot of knowledge… or next to none! Explain to them what it is that you do, your work together, and how all processes unfold.
Are you a therapist? What can they expect from a first session? What shifts might they notice three months in and how will they enable those changes? What’s expected of them outside of sessions on their own? Birth support professionals are in a position where they’re supporting folks at a really vulnerable time, so establishing trust and a positive rapport right away is important. And doctors, for example, might need to explain in layman’s terms what types of tests to expect, why they need to happen, and all possible outcomes. The more you can explain to your clients/patients, the more they’ll feel prepared and at ease.
Ask about their personal fears, anxieties or concerns:
In the first appointment or consultation, try to get a feel for how they’re feeling about all the changes and challenges they’re facing.
Many parents or pregnant people are highly anxious and might have a list of worries. Others might take things in their stride. It’s so important to open the conversation to their questions, fears, concerns or anxieties. By giving them space to talk, you might learn that they have a history with miscarriage, a fear of giving birth, or they’ve heard certain myths that you could help them work through.
Once they’ve opened up about these types of worries, work to address them. Consider if there’s information or other support you can give that will reassure them and put their mind at ease.
Make adequate time for questions
If you’ve ever arrived at a doctor’s appointment with a list of questions only to sense that time’s running out and that there’s a long line of patients to attend to, then you’ll relate to this point. If you want to create a welcoming, supportive environment for a patient or client, make sure there’s adequate time to properly answer all questions they have. They need to understand what’s going on, have a good base foundational knowledge, and not feel rushed out the door.
You don’t want a new or expectant parent to feel lost, or even more confused after meeting with you. You want to make sure that they feel heard and supported instead of anxious and resentful so make space for their questions beyond just the last few minutes of the appointment.
Of course there are situations where time is limited, and if this is the case, make sure you set the expectation up front and explain to the person how you will do your best to address all of their concerns. Also give them information or resources to explore if you weren’t able to cover everything in that appointment, or let them know how to follow up.
If a particular symptom is common, say so
As perinatal therapists and educators, one of the most common questions we hear is a version of: “Am I normal/is this normal?” or “Does this happen a lot or is it only me?”
Make use of your area of expertise by communicating the types of things you see all the time which are entirely to be expected. Knowing that they’re “normal,” or that a particular symptom is common and no big deal can soothe anxiety and put certain worries to bed. This is particularly true for those with health anxiety, OCD, or who tend to catastrophize.
And alternatively, it can also be helpful to be direct about what isn’t normal. For example, telling clients that “yes, anxiety is a common experience but no, it’s not normal to be struggling with debilitating anxiety, so let’s get you some help!” Clients are looking to you to understand where they fall, so take the lead.
Find out about personal goals and work to help them meet those
These goals could be anything from aiming to have a stress-free pregnancy, to learning how to manage mood disorders that have surfaced since having kids, to learning everything to expect about childbirth, or having a birth experience that feels safe.
Are you a lactation consultant? Maybe your client’s goal is having breastfeeding no longer be a source of stress. A couple’s counsellor might be supporting a new mum to reconnect with sexuality and her partner. A nurse might support a pregnant person through anxiety by making the process as comfortable and personable as possible.
Sometimes professionals might notice an area that they could help a patient/client with, but it’s important to attune to the specific goals that they actually intend and consent to address and focus there. You can always check in with those you work with about the direction of you support, and see if there’s anything else they’d rather be focusing on.
Sessional contracting is another powerful tool for creating safety and trust in perinatal care by setting clear expectations and boundaries from the start of each session or appointment. Whether you’re a counselor, doula, lactation consultant, or sleep consultant, this practice helps clients feel informed and empowered by clarifying the purpose of the session, the scope of your role, and any limitations or responsibilities. It also provides an opportunity to discuss confidentiality, consent, and the client’s rights.
Learn about their past experiences with professionals in a similar role
Context matters so much! Our past experiences inform how we deal with the circumstances that present themselves today. Part of building a positive environment for those you deal with in your practice is knowing what their past experiences have been like. They may come to you already having had a really positive or negative experience with a professional in a similar role. That can cause hesitations, an expectation, or mistrust from the get-go.
So consider how you can open the conversation to learn about past experiences. When you have more context about why your client feels the way they do, or is making a particular request, you’re able to bring more compassion and empathy to them. Hearing their stories can also help you attune to specific sensitivities, and possibly create opportunities for healing and growth. For example, knowing what was hard about a prior birth experience can help alert you to support your patient/client in a personal way that helps them heal their overall birthing experience.
Ask about specific personal needs
Not every client or patient will have the same set of needs. When creating positive experiences and welcoming spaces, it’s essential to be curious about the unique person in front of you. For example, a patient with an anxiety disorder may need more time, care, and explanations than another patient.
For LGBTQ+ individuals or those from minority groups, the stakes can be even higher. Many have faced stigma, discrimination, or outright oppression within healthcare systems or society at large. This can lead to understandable hesitancy, distrust, or reluctance to open up about their experiences and needs.
To create safety and inclusivity, consider:
- Using Inclusive Language: Avoid assumptions about gender, relationships, or family structures. Normalize asking for pronouns and using gender-neutral terms until you know a client’s preference.
- Validating Experiences of Oppression: Acknowledging that stigma and discrimination exist can be powerful. Statements like, “I understand that healthcare hasn’t always been a safe place for everyone. I want to make sure this space is safe and supportive for you,” can help foster trust.
- Committing to Ongoing Learning: Staying educated about the unique challenges faced by LGBTQ+ and minority communities, including health disparities and systemic barriers, shows a commitment to being an ally and advocate.
- Creating Physical and Visual Signals of Inclusivity: This could include displaying rainbow flags, diverse family imagery, or literature that represents varied identities. These small signals can make a big difference in how safe a space feels to someone from a marginalized group.
“What do you need?” is a simple question, yet it carries weight. It communicates a willingness to listen and to adapt, which can be incredibly healing for someone who’s been unseen or misunderstood in other settings.
Keep your education current
Things are often changing in therapeutic, mental health and medical fields. You want to properly support parents with the care they need and deserve. Part of that includes keeping your education up to date. There are often new studies debunking myths or revealing new information, or current events that are relevant to this population. There is a huge gap in research about perinatal mental health for minority or marginalized groups in particular, so seeking further understanding for these demographics is important.
Tell them you’re working to create a safe space
You’re working to create a safe, reassuring space within your practice, so go ahead and tell them that! Make your intentions clear and ask them what you can do to support them. Their answer might be something you wouldn’t have even thought of. Naming your goal here also gives them peace of mind right away and opens up dialogue for feedback and communication.
You may find out here that for a new mom, a safe space is one where she can voice and assert physical boundaries during checkups. Or, you may learn that one client needs a lot of space to verbally process and really doesn’t appreciate being interrupted. This point is about being curious, asking questions, and being open to integrating the feedback you get.
Understanding Trauma-Informed Care
Trauma-informed care is an approach to working with clients that acknowledges the widespread prevalence of trauma and its profound impact on individuals’ emotional, physical, and mental well-being. It requires providers to prioritize safety, trust, and empowerment in every interaction. Trauma can stem from various sources, including abuse, neglect, systemic oppression, discrimination, medical trauma, or other adverse life experiences. Importantly, trauma is not always visible, and providers cannot assume that someone’s experience hasn’t been shaped by it.
A trauma-informed approach begins with recognizing that clients may carry invisible wounds into their interactions with healthcare or support services. For perinatal professionals, this could mean understanding how trauma affects someone’s ability to trust providers, disclose personal information, or advocate for their needs. Trauma-informed care asks us to approach every individual with empathy, sensitivity, and curiosity, acknowledging that their behaviours or hesitations may be protective responses rooted in past experiences.
Key principles of trauma-informed care include ensuring physical and emotional safety, offering choice and collaboration, and fostering a sense of empowerment. This might look like clearly explaining processes and expectations, asking for consent before engaging in touch or interventions, using inclusive and respectful language, and making space for the client to express their needs without fear of judgment. Simple shifts, such as saying, “I’d like to ask some personal questions, but you’re welcome to skip anything that feels uncomfortable,” can go a long way in establishing trust.
Trauma-informed care is not only for mental health professionals. It’s a framework that all providers—doulas, lactation consultants, sleep consultants, and other perinatal professionals—can adopt. By creating an environment of safety, validation, and respect, providers can help clients feel seen, heard, and supported, laying the groundwork for meaningful and transformative care.
Final Thoughts
Seeking to build and maintain a safe space for clients is important. Fertility journeys, pregnancy and early parenthood is such a critical time and it’s often accompanied by mood challenges, poor mental health, identity shifts, overwhelm, and relationship struggles. Whether you’re a perinatal therapist like us, a doctor assisting with births, a doula, or any other perinatal provider, building a reassuring space in your practice takes time, thought, and effort. Regardless of what your role is, we hope that the above tips have been helpful. Our mission is a shared one: make sure client/patient needs are met and that they feel seen, respected and empowered when they leave your office.
Are you a professional looking to improve your practice? Our conference is geared towards people like you! With more than 60 seminars and interviews, it covers everything from supporting those in alternative family structures, to guiding folks through postpartum planning, to brain changes during parenting and beyond. This conference also qualifies for PMH-C renewal credits. Find out more here.
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